So my life is not perfect and I doubt yours is, but that doesn't mean I have to sulk around shouting, "MY LIFE SUCKS!" This is something that I did for years. I always thought of way to play the victim. I thought of ways that made me life SUCK. I looked at the bad in everything, even when there was good. I compared my life to that of others, which only made me hate my life more. The truth is, no one's life is perfect all the time. No one's life behind closed doors and being the facade that they put up is just how they planned it. Of course there are probably the rare, rare minority who are truly, happy with their life 100% of the time, but again that's the minority. I used to bash myself a lot. I used to make myself feel like crap. I felt unworthy and useless, but then I had a voice in my head (aka The Husband) who reminded me of how much my life doesn't suck. Sure I'm 30, married with a child, still living at home while I continue to go to school to chance who knows what dream this time, but that doesn't mean everything is bad. My husband and I are different. SHIT...thank god. I couldn't imagine being married to an A type bitch like myself. Oh, the horror. I haven't had the best upbringing, but then again, its been a lot better than most. I had some shitty stuff happen to me along my unplanned road of life, but who doesn't.
Bottom line is that we all may come to a time when we question our life and our value in our lives, but we cannot always focus on the dreams you didn't reach, the goals that you didn't achieve, the house you didn't get, the job you were turned down from or the 6 pack abs that you still haven't developed. Instead, take a step back from your life and look at everything you have done. Look at all the accomplishments you have had. Look at all the people you have made an influence on. Look at all the people who love you for being you.
I used to consider myself some what "smart", but the day my husband told me that I think everything in my life sucks is the day I realized really how stupid and ignorant I was. It takes just a minute for me to continue to name all the great things that I have in my life and have done in my life. Sure society probably labels me as "unsuccessful" for the simple fact that I still live at home, because I dropped at of law school or because I am 30 years old going back to school instead of working and helping to support my family. But you know what I say, "FUCK IT". You only live once and this is my time to live. I can no longer judge my value as a person based on statistically mumbo-jumbo. I can only judge my life by what I consider a success. Until a few days ago, I would say my life was pure shit; however, today I declare that my life is great. I have a beautiful, intelligent daughter who loves me and worships me (and is a little fashionista, DIVA), I have a husband who despite my lack of emotional empathy towards him, loves me with all his heart and is willing to stand by me through all my bullshit and shenanigans that I put him through, I have an education and am furthering my education. I make lifetime friends who love me and trust me. I impact people's lives in the littlest ways.
So while I can say my life sucks because I am in a shit load of student debt and because I barely have money to wipe my own ass, let alone my kid's ass, I can say that my life is good. As a wise man once told me (aka The Husband): My life sucks only if I make it suck.
So out with the bad and in with the good....let's see how long this positivity train last....(I'm hoping it last for awhile)
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